Yesterday, after my post about Freedom from Self-Improvement, I got an email officially kicking me out of an accountability goal setting group.

“Oh, you are SOOOOO out of the accountability group.”

After all, how can I be held accountable if I’m not self-improving?

I understand her fear. What happens to our dreams, and desires that we strive for? Aren’t we supposed to write down our goals and take measures each day to reach them?

If we aren’t improving do we still have goals?

After years of writing down specific goals, and then visualizing them using the Law of Attraction and the Power of Positive Thinking, this is what I’ve come to understand:

If all this visualization and goal-setting worked like I thought it did, I’d be Superwoman teleporting with ease from one celebration to the next without worry of money, health or happiness. It would all be mine for the asking and life would be perfect for me and all my friends and family. I’d live in my dream home, have endless cash to give away, and be known for my work.

I was in sales for many years (in my own business) and had a pretty good measure of success by some standards. I knew how to sell, (it’s a numbers game babe) and how to close, ( If I was able to put together a finance package for you this afternoon would you prefer the red or blue model?),.. yet somehow it was never enough. I never quite reached as high or as far and I thought I should. As I was reaching for the moon, I was hitting the tops of the trees. – Not bad, but far below my expectations.

If I was ‘doing’ all the right things, why wasn’t I even more successful, more rich, more more more..?

Because the important elements of connecting with my spirit, my heart, my unique soul’s journey didn’t come into play for many years. Although I did volunteer work, I still glossed over the instructions about being in gratitude, and service.

Esther Hicks and Norman Vincent Peale discussed these points at length, but I was using my mind to visualize. I’d even follow the directions: smelling, hearing, tasting, feeling my dreams, but it was still all in my head.

The decision to be happy in my heart was missing. To be happy today, regardless of what was happening, or not happening, around me. A commitment to find my inner happiness.

Yesterday, being Freed from Self-Improvement didn’t mean I wasn’t following my dreams, it just meant I was allowing myself to drop the chase, the race of becoming a better ‘Me’, to find my dream.

Sure I’m steadily doing my work, reaching forward, even goal-setting, but I’m allowing myself to be perfectly content with what is.

And as to the question of accountability?

That has everything to do with my day-to-day decisions.

Are my daily choices going to serve my highest self? Or am I spending my time wisely or screwing around being unfocused? – Perhaps due to uncertainty, fear or laziness?

Being accountable means being conscious and aware of each moment, each little small decision. I commit to living in the present, being in gratitude, serving as I can, listening to my own heart, following my path.

That’s accountability.